Alcohol dependence and the treatment of alcoholism began to be discussed with increasing frequency and persistence. There's a problem. How to help an alcoholic deal with addiction?
This question is asked by more than one family member with a similar problem, most often the wife of an alcoholic, who dreams that one day her husband will stop drinking. How to help an alcoholic to stop drinking?
When you want to help a patient with alcoholism, most of the time you are accompanied by a subjective sense of the problem. You are irritated by alcohol, which complicates family relationships and contributes to financial difficulties.
A person who is dependent on alcohol may have only a vague impression that the matter is out of control, and often does not see the problem with alcohol abuse.
He doesn't understand that he has to do something about alcohol addiction, especially when asked to be treated with drugs. The alcoholic sincerely denies that it is.
In the eyes of a drunk, other people who want to help him exaggerate the situation. They are like enemies, not helpers and allies. What can be done to make helping a domestic drunk effective?
How to help an alcoholic to stop drinking?
Paradoxes of assistance provided to a person who drinks.
More than one wife of a drinking man wondered what family life would be like if her husband stopped drinking. In a fit of grief and rage, she launches arguments along the lines of, "If you loved me, you're done with this alcohol a long time ago. "Unfortunately, these kinds of words only bring a result that is fundamentally different from what was intended.
Reinforcing the guilt feeling in the domestic drunk, the result is that the patient wants to drink. The alcoholic's behavior is not a manifestation of his ill will, it is a consequence of the illness.
His emotions, thought and will began to be guided by alcohol, from which it is difficult to escape. Alcohol becomes a way to stifle sadness, boredom, shame, stress, routine.
The mechanism of addiction is that ethanol turns off negative emotions, giving in return, at least for a short time, positive ones - joy, relaxation, peace. When he sobers up, despondency takes over again, and later on, another bottle or beer becomes the "medicine. "
An alcohol dependent person, under the influence of drinks, changes bad emotions to pleasant ones, which leads to a complete lack of desire to change anything in his life. Therefore, the best help for the alcoholic is to confront the alcoholic with reality when he is sober.
Let him experience the consequences of his drunkenness, for example waking up on a park bench without a watch or shoes, paying a drunk-driving fine, and getting a scolding from his boss for not showing up to work after an event with colleagues.
Every negative experience of alcohol intoxication will be a signal to the drinker that drinking alcohol is unattractive and is a serious problem that creates other difficulties - problems in relationships with family or work.
Unfortunately, many people who want to help a loved one, puzzle over how to help an alcoholic deal with addiction, and make every effort to hush up the issue of alcoholism so the family doesn't know about the problem.
Instead of calling the problem "alcoholism" and allowing the drunk to experience the negative consequences of alcohol abuse, people do something completely different. They defend domestic drunks, justify their consumption, hide alcoholic beverages from them, deny that they have any problems with alcohol.
Thus, the drinking family feels "protected" and can still drink with impunity. Often, people who want to free the alcoholic from the shackles unintentionally become drinking helpers and contribute to postponing the decision to stop drinking.
The most common victims of codependency are the wives of alcoholics. If the husband is an alcoholic, then he is addicted to a chemical substance - ethanol, and his wife becomes, curiously, dependent on her alcoholic husband.
She becomes an alleged partner who trusts no one in her spouse's world and, in desperation, is constantly preoccupied with finding a new job to pay her partner's financial obligations. This makes her lie to the children that her father is sick, deny alcoholism, neglect both herself and her children, ignore her own needs.
This problem also requires some therapy. How to help an alcoholic deal with addiction? Until the alcoholic's wife understands that she is not helping him by protecting him from the negative consequences of alcohol intoxication, until then, the husband will drink.
Co-alcoholism is a series of careless behaviors by a partner of an alcohol addict who is trying to adapt to a pathological situation. Unfortunately, this only multiplies the subsequent pathologies and problems.
The family then begins to fiddle with not one, but two addictions - alcoholism and co-alcoholism. The wife makes every effort in good faith - she hopes that this will make it easier for her husband to get out of his addiction. Unfortunately, her efforts have the opposite effect—she unintentionally causes even more illness.
Pays close attention, cares, makes promises, lies, protects - nothing. How to help an alcoholic deal with addiction? To help an alcoholic stop drinking once and for all, you need to stop pretending, admit that you are helpless, and seek professional help.
Helping an alcoholic is a thankless role because the alcohol addict will fight fiercely for their drinks. Having decided to help an alcoholic, it is worth remembering that this is a job for many years, not a day.
A person who drinks will not change under the influence of even the most violent obstacle. Some argue, on the contrary, that it is impossible in yourself to help an alcoholic, because you can only harm yourself. Encourage people to seek help from specialist centers such as addiction therapy centers and others.
Tips for helping someone with alcohol addiction
How to help not to harm and not to increase the development of alcoholism?
Here are some tips and tricks to keep in mind when deciding to support and heal a person who drinks:
- Accept that alcoholism is a chronic disease. Don't see it as an embarrassment and an embarrassment to the family or something that needs to be hidden in front of the whole world.
- An alcoholic is like a naughty child who needs to be punished for lack of discipline and disobedience!
- Don't believe the promises of a home drunk when you realize that it is possible to keep them! An alcoholic may declare his desire for "cosmetic changes", for example, guaranteeing that he will change his type of drink to weaker ones. Don't expect drastic changes motivated by a fight or blackmail.
- Be consistent! If you said you would do something, please do it. Don't worry about leaving when you're not ready.
- No need for reproaches, don't drag yourself into conflicts, don't read sermons, especially when an alcoholic is intoxicated. He already knows everything you want to inspire him. This behavior only provokes more lies and the making of unfounded promises.
- Don't expect an immediate and quick solution to the problem! Alcoholism is a chronic disease, and even long periods of abstinence do not guarantee that the disease will not return. Brew the monastery tea daily, effectively remove alcohol and nicotine addiction.
- Don't check how much an alcoholic drinks, don't keep the purchased bottles, but also don't allow open access to alcohol - this will only lead the alcoholic to even more desperate attempts to obtain alcohol and look for an opportunity to drink.
- Never drink together in the hope that he will drink less and drink less. How can you help an alcoholic to stop drinking if you are sitting and drinking together? No way.
- Don't let the drunkard lie, don't believe his lies and promises, because then you allow him to hope that he will be able to deceive his loved ones.
- Try to give support and love to the alcoholic. Appreciate your attempts to sober up. Remember that alcoholism is a disease, and you don't need to scold anyone for the disease.
Helping an alcoholic will be more effective if you leave him alone - don't insist on rehab, don't scream, don't cry, don't beg, don't prepare sick days, don't borrow money, don't clean up after your drunken parties, let him try put things in order with a hangover. . .
Let him drink at his own risk. The sooner he hits the bottom, the more likely he is to want to give up quickly to start improving.